This is not really a recap. I mean it is. Mostly it is just an elaborate rant of why I'm very disappointed in the premiere of season three. If you don't want to be spoiled this is a warning, if you want to be spoiled this is an invitation.
Season three starts where season two left, with Sam Tarly beyond the wall. I though that was a good enough start, I mean, the prequels in the books tend to be quite ominous and this seemed extremely suitable. What I didn't like was the fact that in season two they threw off the entire white walkers attack on the rangers in the fist of the first men and how the whole raven sending dilemma came about. I guess, for TV factors, they needed to make Sam a big fat fool. Also for TV points, the sentence, "You had only one job". We get it , Weiss, now stop.
CUE NEW THEME SONG.
I personally loved the new theme song. Out of the entire episode my favorite part was the theme song, and that should tell you something. The addition of new locations was just perfect, and is exactly what the audience need due to the oh so many new settings in the story. Also, ASTAPOR.
North of the wall, and deep into the wildlings camp, Jon Snow sees his
first giant. I loved the giant. How normal it was for the wildlings for a
giant to live amongst them and do some of their work. The camera time
of the giant was slightly on the unnecessary longer side but all in all
it was well.
Rattle-shirt and Ygritte take Jon into Mance's tent. Mance
basically tells them both to leave, which they do, albeit Ygritte looked
a bit unwilling to go. Mance then goes on to ask Jon why he wants to
join him. Jon gives him a half-assed answer about how Lord Commander
Mormont knew about Craster sacrificing his sons and how he did nothing
about it. Which is total bull crap. In the book, Jon gives a genuine
well-thought-of answers to Mance's question. In the novel, Mance knows what Jon looks like
because he sneaked into Winterfell to the banquet that was thrown in
the honor of king Robert Baratheon coming to the north at the beginning
of the series. Jon answers Mance's question about the reason he
abandoned the watch by telling him, "All my brothers and sisters were
seated at the main table. Did you see where the bastard was sitting?"
Then we get to see Bronn -who is now a ser- frolicking in a brothel because someone has to get some action in this show, doesn't matter who, anyone will be fine. I don't know why but Bronn has been getting on my nerves for the last few episodes of season 2, and anything he does in this season will just make me hate him.
Something Bronn said to Tyrion really caught my attention, when asked by Tyrion if they were friends, he answered, "We are. But I'm a sellsword, I sell my sword, I don't loan it to friends." I think this is as good an indication as any of a future parting of ways.
I was looking forward to my favorite character's screen time, and I got about 2 minutes of it. I was also very disappointed, but the creators gave me a consolation scene which is fine. Sansa's scene with Shae, Rose, and Peter Baelish. How do I begin talking bout this scene. Okay, first of all let us talk about Sansa and Shae and their little "game". Even though this scene didn't happen in the books, and the whole Shae/Sansa relationship is completely for tv only, I liked it and like the relationship very much. What I don't like is Peter Baelish replacing Dontos in the role of Sansa's escape helper. No. When Sansa learns in the books that Peter is trying to get her out of King's Landing she is instantaneously fearful and cautious, unlike her behavior in this scene. Sansa is also the only character -aside from Joffery and Danaerys- who got a new plot in the beginning of this season, everyone else just sort of continued old plot lines and stories. She still remains my favorite character in terms of character development. She is growing up, not as fast and dramatic as her sister and brother, but maybe in that aspect she's closer to her most distant brother, Jon Snow.
Queen Margery is finally being portrayed as she is in the books, alongside Ser Loras, who are both getting a lot of screen time this season. As for Cersei, Tyrion, and Tywin, there is not much change on that front, all are behaving as befits their personalities. Joffery is still an idiot prick, but at least he's getting some development in this episode.
Robb & Catelyn continued being their boring selves. I mean, God, grow a bit. You've practically started this whole war, Robb, and you've learned nothing to show for it. Roose Bolton said 2 or 3 badass comments about being the strongest or the best or something and that was it for the North. Oh, but wait, they are in Harrenhal. HARRENHAL. I mean come on, HBO. They were supposed to be in Riverrun from the start, and it has been constantly delayed for nothing. Nothing, I tell you. We also meet Qybrin, who I've learned I've been pronouncing the name of wring this whole time.
Davos's and Stannis's scenes were much shorter than I expected, but still satisfactory and true to the novels. I think this is probably the only storyline left not meddled with by the tv adaptation.
Dany's Khalsaar's trip on a ship in the poison water was cut shorter than their trip across the red waste. Thank God for that. If I had to sit through more episodes of Dothraki following Dany to eternal ruin I'd probably stop watching altogether.We get a small glimpse of Astapor and the Unsullied. Missandi translates to Dany a language she already speaks, and we don't get the subtitles of the slave-lord and Missandi's conversation. Dany sees a little dirty girl playing with a wooden ball and being her maternal self follows the child into the city, the child throws the ball at her and tells her to open it, Dany falls with the ball as a hooded figure tries to jump on her only to be stopped by Jorah. The ball opens in two halves to reveal a sort of scorpion creature which the hooded figure soon kills. The child bares her teeth to the the figure, her teeth and gums are a dark night shade of blue, she jumps into the water and then reappears on the wall behind them. "the warlocks!" exclaims Dany to inform the dim witted viewers who still hadn't caught on. The hooded figure then reveals himself to be SER BARRISTAN SELMEY woah what you may think. Well, I'm pissed off by this. First of all this scenes was jumped up about 4 other event in Dany's chapters, it should have been revealed to her as a form of treachery by a new acquaintance. Second of all, I hope the ser Jorah vs Selmey plot line is still in action because otherwise this has taken a great turn for the worst.
Overall, this episode was just setting the characters back into place and reminding the audience where everything was left off, something -I don't think- the show can afford, time-wise. I'm looking forward to next week's episode but I'm keeping my hopes and expectations at bay. I was -and still am- disappointed with the premiere, but I hope the show will take off after this episode. I was disappointed for the lack of Jaime Lannister screen time, as he is almost but not quite the center of the third book.
Also, check out the web-series School of Thrones on Youtube. It is awesome.
Overall rating of the episode: 1/5
Season three starts where season two left, with Sam Tarly beyond the wall. I though that was a good enough start, I mean, the prequels in the books tend to be quite ominous and this seemed extremely suitable. What I didn't like was the fact that in season two they threw off the entire white walkers attack on the rangers in the fist of the first men and how the whole raven sending dilemma came about. I guess, for TV factors, they needed to make Sam a big fat fool. Also for TV points, the sentence, "You had only one job". We get it , Weiss, now stop.
CUE NEW THEME SONG.
I personally loved the new theme song. Out of the entire episode my favorite part was the theme song, and that should tell you something. The addition of new locations was just perfect, and is exactly what the audience need due to the oh so many new settings in the story. Also, ASTAPOR.
 |
| Bricks and blood built Astapor, brick and blood her people. |
 |
| I also starred in Les Miserable as Jan Valjan |
 |
| he only got away with his crappy answer because he gave mance this look |
Then we get to see Bronn -who is now a ser- frolicking in a brothel because someone has to get some action in this show, doesn't matter who, anyone will be fine. I don't know why but Bronn has been getting on my nerves for the last few episodes of season 2, and anything he does in this season will just make me hate him.
Something Bronn said to Tyrion really caught my attention, when asked by Tyrion if they were friends, he answered, "We are. But I'm a sellsword, I sell my sword, I don't loan it to friends." I think this is as good an indication as any of a future parting of ways.
I was looking forward to my favorite character's screen time, and I got about 2 minutes of it. I was also very disappointed, but the creators gave me a consolation scene which is fine. Sansa's scene with Shae, Rose, and Peter Baelish. How do I begin talking bout this scene. Okay, first of all let us talk about Sansa and Shae and their little "game". Even though this scene didn't happen in the books, and the whole Shae/Sansa relationship is completely for tv only, I liked it and like the relationship very much. What I don't like is Peter Baelish replacing Dontos in the role of Sansa's escape helper. No. When Sansa learns in the books that Peter is trying to get her out of King's Landing she is instantaneously fearful and cautious, unlike her behavior in this scene. Sansa is also the only character -aside from Joffery and Danaerys- who got a new plot in the beginning of this season, everyone else just sort of continued old plot lines and stories. She still remains my favorite character in terms of character development. She is growing up, not as fast and dramatic as her sister and brother, but maybe in that aspect she's closer to her most distant brother, Jon Snow.
Queen Margery is finally being portrayed as she is in the books, alongside Ser Loras, who are both getting a lot of screen time this season. As for Cersei, Tyrion, and Tywin, there is not much change on that front, all are behaving as befits their personalities. Joffery is still an idiot prick, but at least he's getting some development in this episode.
 |
| House words: Curly Locks. |
Robb & Catelyn continued being their boring selves. I mean, God, grow a bit. You've practically started this whole war, Robb, and you've learned nothing to show for it. Roose Bolton said 2 or 3 badass comments about being the strongest or the best or something and that was it for the North. Oh, but wait, they are in Harrenhal. HARRENHAL. I mean come on, HBO. They were supposed to be in Riverrun from the start, and it has been constantly delayed for nothing. Nothing, I tell you. We also meet Qybrin, who I've learned I've been pronouncing the name of wring this whole time.
 |
| essentially, the reversed Snape. |
Dany's Khalsaar's trip on a ship in the poison water was cut shorter than their trip across the red waste. Thank God for that. If I had to sit through more episodes of Dothraki following Dany to eternal ruin I'd probably stop watching altogether.We get a small glimpse of Astapor and the Unsullied. Missandi translates to Dany a language she already speaks, and we don't get the subtitles of the slave-lord and Missandi's conversation. Dany sees a little dirty girl playing with a wooden ball and being her maternal self follows the child into the city, the child throws the ball at her and tells her to open it, Dany falls with the ball as a hooded figure tries to jump on her only to be stopped by Jorah. The ball opens in two halves to reveal a sort of scorpion creature which the hooded figure soon kills. The child bares her teeth to the the figure, her teeth and gums are a dark night shade of blue, she jumps into the water and then reappears on the wall behind them. "the warlocks!" exclaims Dany to inform the dim witted viewers who still hadn't caught on. The hooded figure then reveals himself to be SER BARRISTAN SELMEY woah what you may think. Well, I'm pissed off by this. First of all this scenes was jumped up about 4 other event in Dany's chapters, it should have been revealed to her as a form of treachery by a new acquaintance. Second of all, I hope the ser Jorah vs Selmey plot line is still in action because otherwise this has taken a great turn for the worst.
 |
| this, like that slave's chest, is pointless. |
Overall, this episode was just setting the characters back into place and reminding the audience where everything was left off, something -I don't think- the show can afford, time-wise. I'm looking forward to next week's episode but I'm keeping my hopes and expectations at bay. I was -and still am- disappointed with the premiere, but I hope the show will take off after this episode. I was disappointed for the lack of Jaime Lannister screen time, as he is almost but not quite the center of the third book.
Also, check out the web-series School of Thrones on Youtube. It is awesome.
Overall rating of the episode: 1/5
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